The journey is the risk..and the reward

“We were all delighted, we all realized we were leaving confusion and nonsense behind and performing our one noble function of the time, move."

-Jack Kerouac, On the Road

Onward We Move

And it's time for us to move. It's time to push forward to the next adventure. Alas, the whirlwind promo tour for Eclipse has finally spun to a close, save for a shriek-worthy drive-by from Kristen and Rob at the AMC theaters in Century City this week. StrawberryStew and WFEFuckhotRob in the same room together, though brief, caused explosions far worthier than a Fourth of July fireworks display.

The way he looks at her? Ka-BOOM.

Before pulling away from the curb en route to the highway, let's take a moment to pay homage to the movie Eclipse. I personally felt it was the best of the three. I went to see it on opening day, with my sister Puss and good friend who is as close as my sister, SK. We had reserved seats at a swanky theater which contained an open bar and tables at our seats to set up all our glasses of vodka. Some of us *ahem* had many glasses, so thank goodness for that table and drink holders. For me, everything about Eclipse (except for the wigs) improved a dozen-fold. The pacing, the special effects, the inclusion of important story lines, the acting all vastly exceeded. Balanced. Kristen killed it. She reminded everyone out there that they're wasting their time on a team worshipping the boys. I am a Team Bella/Team Kristen gal, and I was elated beyond consonant sounds to see Girlfriend represent. I drank in the chemistry that is Kristen and Robert. Their energy is crazy electric and not only was I turned on by their interactions, I felt almost guilty and pervy for watching there intimate moments of love declarations, marriage proposals and attempts at removing clothing. If  Breaking Dawn gets the fan fiction treatment of the love scenes as rumored, then I'm going to have to excuse myself to use the restroom and then smoke a cigarette.

Sweet and pretty, yes. Explosive? um. NO.
Thanks for the memories, Eclipse!

So, I am going to stop right here and urge you to read CC's (of KSTEW IS BETTER THAN YOU) review of Eclipse. It's the only review for me that wades through the bullshit, with a healthy dose of #TEAMCHARLIE as well. Do it. Read her review (but don't forget to come back here), and comment. She basically crawled into my brain through my eyehole and expressed my exact thoughts but in her much more articulate, brilliant, snarky fashion. Read it here:-- CC's Eclipse Review

Having tipped my hat to Eclipse, let's talk about Kristen's next project and the essence of this week's Musings. Kristen is about to embark on a new journey of sorts. A road trip, if you will. She is leaving shortly for Montreal (where she will attend Beatnik Bootcamp), New Orleans and Mexico to film the seminal and aching On the Road based on Jack Kerouac's memoir/novel of the same name.

Now, I'll probably dedicate an entire future essay to my thoughts about On the Road, the book, the movie and how I believe that this role combined with Welcome to the Rileys will catapult Kristen to the cusp of legend; so, I'll keep my gushing to a minimum here. I just wanted to take a moment to touch on some important concepts borne of Kristen's involvement with this amazing project.

Themes represented in On the Road include restlessness, the search for creative expression, friendship, loss and finding a niche (hmmm, could Jack Kerouac be of Rebel Royal lineage?). Also there's the undercurrent of challenging authority as well as mores of genders. Mary Lou, the main female character in the story, and the role of which our Other Queen Kristen will portray, is promiscuous, stubborn, defiant, intelligent and grappling with the challenges of defining herself. She is damaged and broken but passionate. She does not participate in anything halfway. She is a Go Big Or Go Home Girl. Well, none of the characters in the story are half-assers. MaryLou, Dean and Sal all take the risk, and jump at the chance to take the journey into self-reflection...and perhaps self-redemption...? But in Kerouac's closing thoughts in the book, he realizes that while he makes it to his destination, he is haunted by and forever affected by the events on his journey.

Oh, and BlondeStew will play Mary Lou. mmmmm gah.

Take a Chance on Me

And so that leads me to this week's theme: taking the risk, and reverence for the journey. Last week I walked the line of self indulgence as I told you lovelies that I had a hard time which induced many tears. Your kind emails, tweets and DMs were received with bewilderment and gratitude. You all have gone above and beyond in offering support and cheerleading, and I want you to know that you have helped me. Immensely. Why do I say this? Because I've made some movement. Because I gathered some courage and decided to return to my bold roots, and my gypsy spirit rejoices. You all know that I've struggled with the likes of BastardNation, witnessed my soul sucked out through my toes leaving behind a person unsure if working in the healing profession is in fact, bad for my health. You all remember the Miracle Bubbles when I decided I'd follow my bliss:

The bliss was because I had decided to forgo Plan B and finally finally pursue Plan A: Creative Living. Singing, playing piano and guitar, writing, photography, Grilled Cheese Sandwiches as offering to work for ODO and Cascadega in BadAssVille in the Department of Royal Rebel Defense. Last week as I tried to keep the panic at bay, I realized that my unemployment term is very quickly closing in on me and I hadn't even begun to scratch the surface in my plans. And I am flat broke on top of it all. All the accolades and pretty words in the world will not pay my rent or my car loan. So I sat down a couple nights ago, and listened to a little Prodigy and The Swell Season and kicked my own arse.

I reminded myself how I've never ever let the pressure defeat me nor my optimism in this whole year of hardship. I reminded myself of all the risks I've taken in my life that have paid off beautifully: moving 500 miles away from my childhood home to a city where my soul is soothed; Going to graduate school at a private academy to obtain a Masters and credential to practice psychology instead of the world-renowned University I had originally planned for; strapping on a backpack and purchasing a one-way ticket to Southeast Asia in search of "home"... The travel essays I'm writing regarding the risks I've taken are filled only with moments in time, snapshots in my mind's eye of profound connection. It's the road not the terminus.

My travels to SE Asia led me to N..who led me to this lovely Hall.
That is me, the day before I married N on that staircase. 

So a couple days ago, I walked in my neighborhood en route to my favorite diner with N. We passed a block full of picturesque boutiques and cafes. I wasn't feeling any heightened sense of emotion except hunger for my egg and bacon sandwich. But something pretty miraculous must have occurred in order for me to shake off my breakfast-vision. Well, it was an opportunity for movement.

What did I do? I smooshed my face against the clean, streak free windows and tried to see as much as possible into the building. I called the telephone number on the RENT sign. I explained to a voicemail box that I am a therapist and I'm interested in seeing the room available. I didn't have any other words, so I left my name and a telephone contact number. My fingers were tingling and the hair stood up on my arms as I surveyed the front of the small building at which I was still gaping. This space actually has two rooms to choose from and it's a part of a HEALING CENTER.

I KNOW. After doing the happy-happy-joy-joy Ren and Stimpy dance, I skipped the rest of the way to the diner to meet N for my breakfast sandwich. I received a call within 20 minutes from the owner of the Healing Center. With my mouthful of eggs, I set up an appointment with the owner. I physically saw the space yesterday.

Fast forward to this morning. The owner calls and tells me she just had conversed with her partner about bringing on a mental health therapist into the practice a day ago, and the benefits of having psychotherapy available to their clients. Cue ME calling them about the rental.  The owner told me she'd like for me to become apart of their practice. They want my name to be on the front window along with the massage therapists, acupuncturists, and chiropractors for a holistic practice. They want my mother-loving, Kristen-and-Rob-adoring mug on their Wall of Healers. At this point I'm glad I smooshed my face into the smudge-free glass, and that knowing I had nothing to lose, I called the phone number on that RENT sign. There is no signed deal yet. This all just happened, like today, but I feel a deep satisfaction in knowing that I opened up channels because I took a walk towards my breakfast sandwich, and was open to Synchronicity (The Universe's nudges can be sublime). Like Kristen, it is time for me to transition into the next phase of creativity: the working stage. But the movement is what is most important. While the final destination is important, the initial intention and physical kinesis of deciding on taking the risk: that is the reward. The trigger towards progression is really IT.

This was kinda what I looked like on my walk home from breakfast

Featured Rebel Royal: Frieda Pinto

Lets talk about a couple ladies who have taken risks in embracing their inner Mary Lou. The lovely Frieda makes her debut as a Rebel Royal today, though she has been on Team Other's radar for at least the past two years. Born and raised in Mumbai India, Ms. Pinto is the first Other Queen of Asian descent to be featured (oh but believe me, she is not the last, not even close). A B.A. graduate of English Literature and Psychology first, a model and actress second, Frieda broke into the mainstream's conscious with her role of Latika in the brilliant and effecting Slumdog Millionaire. In the movie, Latika endures poverty, homelessness, servitude as a gangster's mistress all in attempts to keep her true love free. In real life, Frieda's very swift introduction to Hollywood threw her into the trajectory of the BullShit People's feedback. Frieda had been dating publicist Rohan Antao for nearly five years, and as her star rose in the world, their union did not withstand the pressure. The pair parted ways in the year that Millionaire traveled the world for promotional tours. She currently dates her Slumdog Millionaire costar Dev Patel.

Beauty Marks: 1. Classically trained in Indian dance 2. Anchored for international travel show (I am in love with her for this) 3. First language is Konkani (can you even pronounce this, let alone understand the complexities of speaking it?) 4. Spokesmodel for Loreal, the first representing Asian/Indians

Offenses of Otherness: (Per Other-Hunters, Critics and AssClowns) 1. Defied the prescribed physical characteristics of models: is petite, dark-skinned, of Asian descent 2. Auditioned for a large studio film in her first outing (Go Big or Go Home) 3. Showed discernment and sensitivity while dealing with matters of the heart and her personal relationships.

Forever a dreamer and believer in taking risks, Frieda began modeling and attending acting classes while juggling her college courses. Upon graduation, she worked as a travel correspondent for an international television show, and took the chance and auditioned for Slumdog Millionaire. It would be her first movie ever if she landed the role. After six months of screening and reading for the directors and producers, then waiting for news, Frieda learned she received the coveted role of Latika in Millionaire. Frieda's very first acting job became a wold wide success and received every accolade and award handed out including the Oscar for Best Picture. Frieda herself received a BAFTA nomination for Actress in a Supporting Role. And in a familiar romantic twist, Frieda met and fell in love with her co-star Dev Patel. Because she took never took her eyes off her goal, and decided to journey in pursuit of it, Frieda Pinto is an Other Queen.

Reigning Other Queen: Kristen Stewart

The lovely Kristen Jaymes Stewart has always, always credited her decisions of following her heart over her mind in auditioning for or pursuing film roles. Her astute discernment of roles have garnered her an extremely impressive resume. In a recent Eclipse press junket, Kristen claimed:

"I am motivated to keep working when I am happy, and not lying to anybody"

She reports choosing roles based on how she relates to the character, in finding the humanity beneath the grit. She embodies the job completely: studying and spending time with patients with Friedrich's Ataxia so as to consume and be consumed by the role of Georgia, a terminally ill teenager with the neurological disease in a quiet and lovely film The Cake Eaters.

Beauty Marks: 1. Will choose a film role based on her emotional resonance with it instead of perceived box-office reception. 2. Looks for the humanity in every character she chooses to portray. 3. Will risk public backlash and slander so as to speak her truth. 4. Chooses to be in a relationship with Rob Pattinson though she has to endure the wrath and threats of critics and angry "fans"

Offense of Otherness: (Per BullShit People, Other-Hunters and AssClowns) 1. She appears miserable and somber all the time 2. Is ungrateful for her career and successes 3. Is unhappy with her personal relationships, she has no friends 4. Has little to no control over her fine motor skills (nervous tics much?)

To prepare for her role in Welcome to the Rileys as the stripper/prostitute Mallory, Kristen fully immersed herself in the journey of finding her inner broken girl. According to US Elle Magazine:

To prepare, she lived on junk food, learned to pole dance, chain-smoked, and stayed up all night. The rough living took its toll: Her legs bloom with bruises and her sallow skin with blemishes, all of them real. It’s difficult to imagine another young actress subordinating her looks so completely to her performance. This may well be the role that loosens the association between Kristen Stewart and Bella Swan, poster child for teenage angst. "

Other Queens Are Coming Home

Because I recognized that to break away from the ensuing panic that was threatening my happiness I needed to hit the road, and call Plan A out by name, I am holding a spot on the Homecoming Court.

Because she blew the antiquated physical requirements to bits with her small stature, dark skin and Eastern features all in her first audition for film work, Frieda is Rebel Royalty.

Because she refuses to take the easy route in preparing for a job that often takes her to the Dark Place, Kristen Stewart is our  Reigning Other Queen.

I am Other.

Frieda is Other.

Kristen is Other.

Others make the journey not with the destination in mind.

Embrace YOUR Other.


“The one thing that we yearn for in our living days, that makes us sigh and groan and undergo sweet nauseas of all kinds, is the remembrance of some lost bliss”

-Jack Kerouac, On the Road

Question: Are you taking the chances offered now to follow your bliss?

*All Kristen/Twilight pictures from KStewartfan.org and special thanks to TeamKristenSite*

A/N: This weekend I am embarking on a mini road-trip with one of my Sisters Marble Pole to meet up with fellow Sisters to watch Eclipse for the nth time. Big ups to Marble Pole for her willingness to be Thelma to my Louise this weekend. Love to Julie  for her weekly pre-Musings check in. Hugs, kisses and tears to @Bouffant00, @Buff_82 and @Kstewsbtrthanu for pre-reading and giving me honest, constructive feedback that elevate words to prose, for leaving ME speechless. To Possum Besties @Ophelia2010 and @Justice_Aussie for Skyping me and reminding me why I fell in love with you in the first place (DELICIOUS ACCENTS). A Special W00t to the Clog-Wielding Queen who not only is brilliant but should really be writing her own memoirs. To @MissBettySmith for taking a chance and meeting me for some yummy soup. Your bright eyes miss NOTHING. As Always: My CyberSisters and Readers: You are an integral part of this journey and I would have it no other way. I am at your service, always.