The weary traveler goes home

If you go, if you go...

leave me down here on my own...

I'll wait for you

--In My Place, Coldplay

We went about one month without seeing hide nor hair of Kristen. While it was vexatious in moments, I was content in knowing she was completely occupied embodying her role as Marylou for the already-legendary film On the Road. The knowledge that she was invested in her work and not hiding from the Vulture-Papz eased the ache just a teensy bit. Well, then suddenly, um. BAM. I think it was even just after I had posted Musings, late last Thursday night. Near Midnight here in Cali. We got a look at Kristen in her costume for Marylou. And then, holy mother, we got pics of Rob from the same day. Outside Kristen's trailer on the set for On the Road.

I was a bit conflicted as to whether I would post any of those pics, as I completely disagree with the invasive nature in which the Vultures typically obtain pics of Robert and Kristen (i.e. stalking, lurking, heckling, invading, ridiculing, then selling those images for an obscene amount of money to grocery store tabloids). But I figured I could post a few of the pictures...because I'm all for supporting Rob and Kristen in their quest to Communicate, Mofos! And I admittedly enjoy watching as Rob and Kristen concisely express their thoughts about papz and perhaps to some of their more extreme-clingy Not-A-Fan Stalkers, without saying a word. And we here at Team Other love Non-Verbal Communication! And besides: Rob sees you, you Stalker Lice.

You know that I can see you there, right?

And MarylouStew says:

I have cold cream, I will use it, Lurkers.

Just not in a way you hoped.

You will not enjoy it.

BeastieBoyRob Says to the Vultures:

"I can't stand it, I know you planned it...!

This is all your...Sabotage"

So the pictures of MarylouStew in her lovely strawberry-blonde locks caused some rejoicing in the Kristen fandom. And when the pics of Rob in his classic Beastie Boy t-shirt surfaced, I'm pretty sure I heard bodies hitting the floor in a faint. Rob was there. To see his Queen, our Queen, Kristen. As soon as he wrapped up filming for his own film Water for Elephants in Los Angeles, after his obligatory work accepting surfboards at the Teen Choice Awards, the dude was on a plane to Montreal to be with his lady love. In the two or three days after those first pictures emerged into the limelight, Kristen and Rob fans began receiving the most incredible gifts of nonverbal communication that it actually overwhelmed. There were The Nuzzle pics. There were the Kristen-is-practicing-her-Lindy Hop-moves pics, and there were about two hundred fan encounters and pictures that materialized. This one was my favorite:

I cant..I just...yesss...for so many reasons..gah!

I prefer this  for many reasons, one of them being that Rob and Kristen are in it...together. Also, this nice lady and her kids made this a family affair and she and her family (husband/dad snapped the picture, after asking Rob and Kristen's permission first) interacted respectfully with the couple, thus being rewarded with the singular shot of the night with both Rob and Kristen in it, intentionally. Well then, of course, THIS happened. And it became one of my favorites evah.

quite honestly, I think this is more revealing

than all of the others.

This picture led to the pics seen 'round the world, with a confirmation that for some reason people still needed: Kristen and Robert are together...as a couple. A K-I-S-S-I-N-G couple. If you haven't seen the grainy pictures yet a.) you're in the minority and b.) you will need to check out the gossip sites elsewhere to see 'em. That's the compromise I made with myself when alluding to The Kissing Pictures. Ok. So what will I post? How bout some more Communicating, my Other Rabble Rousers?!!

Nobody looks this good when walking. 

Nobody but them.

Going Home

So today's Musings is dedicated to the glorious moment of realizing we belong somewhere. That we have a place reserved only for ourselves where we can kick off our shoes, breathe deeply and share that space with what or whomever we choose.

This is something I know a whole lot about. Friends and family know me as "gypsy" or "bohemian nomad". I have the wanderlust pretty fiercely. It's a thirst in me that overtakes and overruns. Fortunately, I was raised by a woman who prescribed to the most incredible philosophy:

Travel is Education.

Travel is Important.

Travel is Life.

Also, with my Island Blood coursing through my veins, and my constant seeking for "belonging" as an Other..and a child of adoption, I was destined to explore and find my niche. Throw in the fact that smack dab in the middle of the years I simply refer to as: 2005 Thru 2007, I lost some major footing and was seeking grounding and direction. In the dark, dark time right after my "BreakThrough" as I lovingly refer to it (reference the Musings titled "Finding your voice..."), I needed to ...go away. To heal. To remind myself what I was doing here, what my direction was. What was worth preserving. I was scattered, lacking balance, and I was RUN RUN RUN RUNNNNING from everything. And "dating" enough people for my friends and family to jokingly refer to my dates as "the UN Panel". What? So I'm worldly. I've told you guys that before. Don't judge. In this particular time, I was granted an opportunity to travel to Asia for the first time. Oh I TRAVELED. I spent time in China, South Korea, Japan, Hong Kong, and finally, my own islands: The Philippines.

Nara, Japan.

World's Tallest Buddha.

un.be.lieve.able.

I had no choice.

It's The Great Wall of China!

I raced to the highest peak and screamed "HELLLLLO"

What is the saying? You don't know what you have until it's gone...? Or...You must travel so far away to realize you were home all along.... There's no place like Home....All of this was true for me. This could be the same for Rob and Kristen. Home. Home. Home. I discovered in my lengthy travels, even having a week on my own in The Philippines to discover my culture, that HOME is where my heart soared. Home did not have a mailbox with my name attached to it. Home was in my suitcase, with my flip flops, in my iPod. Home was where I made it. Home was shared with whatever or whomever I wanted to share it with. Home became to which I referred as my inner contentedness. A certainty that I was ok being a female, adopted and bi-racial and pierced and tattooed and voluptuous and a fan of both Rage Against the Machine AND Fergie...a confidence that wherever I was...I was OK. I didn't need to go in search of my biological parents when I went to the Philippines...But I did go and find my culture.. I ate the cuisine, I listened to the music, I spoke with families and had meals with folks who wanted nothing more than to share their family recipe and fresh mangoes from the tree. It makes perfect sense that I managed to meet my future husband N while I was traveling all over the world and realizing that not only did I fit a standard of "beauty" in some parts of the world, but that I was just fine doing so on my own. He did not complete some unfinished project that I represented. He stands beside me. Home. 

So this week, I'd say Rob went where he was content. To be with the person who seems to be ok with everything that he is. And he seems to be ok with everything that Kristen is. All in her Other Queen gloriousness. Home. 

Featured Rebel Royal: Jenny Lewis

Well, kids, you know how I love me my gingers. Here's another lovely red-headed rebel I wanted to introduce you to. Her name is Jenny, and she is a singer, songwriter and former child actor. You may recognize her from her work in one of my very favorite childhood movies: Troop Beverly Hills but, perhaps you adore her for being the near-primary front-woman for the indie-rock band Rilo Kiley.

While she made her show business debut in a JELL-O commercial, and appeared in over a dozen teen-themed TV movies and films, including The Wizard, it was in 1998 that Jenny stopped acting in favor of forming a band with friends. She is a singer/songwriter, guitarist and keyboard player for the band that has released five albums. She also has released two solo albums, appearing with The Watson Twins in her debut album Rabbit Fur Coat and then later, sans the twins in the country-tinged, indie-rock flavored Acid Tongue. 

Offenses of Otherness:

*has "girlishly seductive & versatile vocals"

*formed a band for the love of music, 

having no financial backing

*in-demand vocal collaborator with musicians:

Postal Service, Death Cab for Cutie, and

Elvis Costello

Miss Lewis has an admirer in our Reigning Other Queen Kristen! Kristen reported once having admired Jenny's stage presence and performance abilities. When asked by MTV during the promo tour for The Runaways, Kristen reported that one of her favorite musicians was "Jenny Lewis". Pretty fantastic endorsement coming from Rebel Royalty, and one who has famously pristine taste in music. 

Reigning Other Queen: Kristen Stewart

In this epic week of Kristen sightings, MarylouStew sightings, and Kristen and Rob "home-comings", her film On the Road is gaining much attention, not only for the incredible cast attached to it, and not  just because it's an iconic book in American literature, but because of Kristen's participation in it. Naysayers claim that Kristen's well-known partnership with Rob, or her involvement with Twilight  is responsible for her "fame", but Kristen's impressive colleagues from previous movies tout and praise Kristen's acting ferocity, disputing the naysayers. "She is utterly fierce" says Melissa Leo, Kristen's Welcome to the Rileys co-star.   Maria Bello, of The Yellow Handkerchief describes Kristen as "wonderful to work with, and a wonderful actress".  And early movie critics have hailed Kristen's casting as Marylou as "wise". 

Offenses of Otherness:

*willingly displays her vulnerability


*seeks honest and authentic colleagues as her support network


*unabashedly direct in giving her opinion

Because I ran ran ran ran far from home to realize I could never shake what was always mine, I am making the steps towards Other Queendom.

Because she picked up a guitar and sang for an unsigned, unknown musical union of friends, having walked away from a potentially successful acting career, Jenny is a fierce Rebel Queen.

Because Kristen has made her opinion on parasitic creatures preying on her personal life--including her relationship with Rob--abundantly clear, without having to say a word, Kristen is Reigning Other Queen.

Jenny is Other.

Kristen is Other.

Others recognize Home not as a location,

but a state of being.

Embrace your Other. 

Question: Who, what, where is Home for You?

A/N: Thank you to Bouffant, as always for pre-reading and perusing the Thesaurus with me--it's like fucking Christmas when I'm using a thesaurus, and B played. Thank you to @Buff82 for making this whole thing pretty. I still tear up when I pull up the page and see her art. As always, thank you to CC, as her joy in writing KSIBTU inspires me daily. To Iris @Just2CUSmile, who holds my hands while I cry through the night..while reading stories. Thank you to my beloved Sisters &Readers including Sail, Julie, Lowkey, Brothaa (Missy) and as always, the Clog Wielding Queen. I want to thank two writers who have broken my heart and surpassed all that is beautiful this week with words they've written: H32M who writes Disappear Here and Danieller123, author of the staggering Under the Apple Tree. You teach me more. You teach me about Exquisite Poetry. I bow down to you.  Thank you to Kathryn, my Welsh Muse, Manager and friend. And to her outrageously gifted husband, my friend Keiron. You INSPIRE. See you all next Thursday.